My headaches have gotten worse. I can hardly keep my eyes open sometimes. My back has been constantly hurting. It feels as though my muscles are tensed at all times. 

I woke up today with the worst back pain I've had so far. It's radiating through my whole back. Even my shoulders starting to feel sore. 

I couldn't sleep last night. It's really difficult to get comfortable. Before the pain pills helped me sleep, but now they don't as much and I don't want to start taking more and become dependent on them. I'm so tired it's hard to think. 

I have a really bad head ache. It makes it hard to do anything except close my eyes. I don't know what caused it. The pain is making me nauseous. 

Went on a walk. The sunlight really hurts my head. Even with sunglasses, it gives me a headache. 

Morning

I think I've been clenching my jaws at night due to this neck brace because every morning I wake up and my teeth and jaw hurt and I have a serious headache. 

Morning

I think I've been clenching my jaws at night due to this neck brace because every morning I wake up and my teeth and jaw hurt and I have a serious headache. 

After dinner

My nausea first started when they put the neck brace on me. They gave me medication for it, but it only helped a little.  I take more nausea medication than pain medication. I've only been eating very mild foods since because of my stomach. Today I had mild pineapple curry And my stomach is now killing me. It hurts so bad. I can hardly move. 

Focusing

I'm having a really hard time focusing on anything. It takes a lot of effort just to concentrate for a few minutes, and that's all I can manage before I start getting dizzy and my head hurts. 

12/19/14

OToday is Friday, December 19 2014. I was in a severe car accident in between Sunday night and Monday morning. I'm not quite sure the exact time of the accident. 

My memory from that night is really foggy. 

Part of me already knew I had been in an accident by the time I was fully conscious. It's all in bits and pieces. I remember the EMTs working to get me strapped in. I remember the ambulance.  

Because I was so conscious, I figured I was fine. The nurse even told my mom around 2 am that they would just be doing a rutine check up and that I would probably be released soon. It wasn't till around 5 am that they told me that I broke my neck. She said she wasn't going to lie to me, it was serious. 

It's been hard for me to think straight. 

I find myself searching for words. 

I have a constant head ache. 

My neck is super stiff. 

My back hurts even worse. 

I get dizzy from everything. I get dizzy every time I stand up, when I stand up for too long, and when I lay back down again. 

It's impossible for me to get comfortable.  

It's hard for me to stay on track. 

I get lost in conversations easily. 

I get nervous everyone I'm in cars now. I don't know if they're flashbacks or if I have ptsd. 

I started remembering part of the crash today. 

I sent this text to Adam. "Being in the car right after the accident. The roof is off. Someone to my right is telling me I was just in an accident and not to move. The paramedics are on their way. I hear Travis stir. He starts to move. They yell at him to stop moving. His side of the car is compacted in and his leg is pinned. I can tell. It's hurting him. He's not fully conscious. He's aware of the pain though. He keeps trying to move. They ask his name. "Travis" "Travis stop moving" they yell. He's not listening. I start yelling "Travis stop fucking moving" and he stops. I'm staring at trees above me. I black back out. "

It's weird getting my memory back. I wonder how I ever forgot about it. I wonder what else I'm going to remember  . I'm scared to find out.